Not urgent
This essay won’t disappear in 24 hours. Read it at your convenience.
This essay was inspired by an email I got from a reader, Rafael, or, more specifically, the wholesome signature:
“Hi, Anton!
Your newsletter reminds me of the “old internet.”
Simple, light, fun, personal. It's like reading updates from a long-distance friend.
Thought I should comment :)
Cheers!
Some people expect an immediate response. I don't. Feel free to respond when it's best for you. Let's make work more asynchronous and less urgent.“
Which, in turn, is consensually stolen from Becky.
This essay won’t disappear within 24 hours. You can read it whenever you find a cup of tea in your hand (or save it for later before writing off once your bookmark backlog reaches three figures 🙈).
On mute by default
I’m a relatively anxious person with a restless mind. I easily fall into the trap of switching five contexts in one minute, which is also a recipe for me to feel exhausted and miserable even before it gets dark (which is roughly at 3 p.m. in Warsaw in October).
This is why I have notifications off in (almost) all of my communication apps, both on mobile and desktop: Telegram, Gmail, Slack, etc.
I typically reply within a day, sometimes within a week, and almost never within 10 minutes (unless it’s a continuous conversation). In most situations, I expect the same from others.
The expectation influences how I write. Instead of typing “Hi!” and hitting that sweet Enter key 😬, it’s gonna be “Hi! How about we <…> This would be cool because <…> On the other hand <…> Tell me what you think.” in a single message.
Different channels for different urgencies
But Anton, what if something urgent happens that needs your immediate attention?
In this case, I ask my close ones to call me or (in a less urgent scenario) send me an SMS. The notification settings are kind to known callers and senders. The on-mute-by-default strategy only works if I have this peace of mind.
Also, when we lived together with my ex-partner, we agreed to send non-urgent stuff (”this draniki recipe is a blasphemy”) via muted Telegram while time-sensitive messages (”look, the magpies are fighting with the squirrel again!”) were reserved for unmuted WhatsApp.
Temporary unmute
There is one more exception to the mute rule. Whenever a message from someone can affect my immediate plans, I temporarily unmute them — otherwise I’d need to check my phone every five minutes anyway.
Here are a few scenarios:
We are about to meet, and I want to know if you are running late.
You are my crush, and I’ve just messaged you for the first time.
I’ve sent you a job offer and I’m waiting for your decision.
This explains why I still get ~4 notifications a day from Telegram (it’s mostly the first scenario, I’m not a Casanova or a recruiter 😅):
P.S. I wish there was Unmute for ... hours not just Mute for ... hours (sent my feedback to Telegram, although with little hope):
Give it a go?
It’s easy for me to take this setup for granted, since I’m so used to it. I’m still restless, but now manageably so.
However, from time to time, I co-work Get 20% off your next purchase... on someone else’s New Telegram message from Aliaksei computer and realise Time to BeReal! how far my reality is from the norm.
If you want to try a life with fewer distractions, here’s my suggestion:
Let your family, friends, and colleagues know how to reach you in case of an emergency.
Mute the hell out of your phone and computer.
Temporarily unmute certain conversations when needed.
If you do, let me know how it goes.
Favourites
Things I’ve been fascinated by lately:
✍️ Why We’re Betting Against Slack. Typically, most pseudo-urgent communication happens at work, but it doesn’t have to be that way. I can imagine myself working at Doist if Fibery becomes too successful 😅, which says a lot.
🎬 (46 min) Taskmaster is a British comedy show that I’ve long been fond of and always struggled to describe. I remember the first time I heard about the premise from Olya: “Comedians do weird tasks in a house.” Okaaay, I guess 🤷? Let me just say that there hasn’t been an episode that I’ve watched without a single out-loud laugh.
🎙️ (1h 20m) How Strava was founded: a pretty remarkable story. “How I Built This” is, in general, one of my favourite podcasts: I love the thoroughness of the pre-interview research and the vulnerability the founders often show.
This was issue #5, find more at antoniokov.com.
How do you manage digital distractions? Is your phone permanently in DND mode, or are you simply notification-blind at this point?
Reply to this email and share your perspective.